Are Your Relationships Codependent?

Common Codependent Relationships

In the examples below, the first person is dependent on the second person and the second person is actually the codependent one in the relationship … needing to be needed.

• A wife is excessively helpless around her husband … and the husband needs his wife to stay helpless.
• A husband is excessively needy in how he relates to his wife … and the wife needs him to stay needy.
• A student is excessively tied to a teacher … and the teacher needs the student to stay tied to him/her.
• A child is excessively pampered by the parent … and the parent needs the child to stay in need of pampering.
• An employee is excessively entangled with an employer … and the employer needs the employee to stay entangled.
• A friend is excessively fixated on another friend … and that person needs the friend to stay fixated.
• A counselee is excessively clinging to a counselor … and the counselor needs the counselee to continue clinging.
• A disciple is excessively dependent on a discipler … and the discipler needs the disciple to stay dependent.
• A spiritual seeker is excessively leaning on a spiritual leader … and the leader needs the seeker to continue leaning.

When we have a misplaced dependency, we have a misplaced trust. We are excessively trusting in the relationship to provide more than God intended. The Psalms describe a misplaced trust…

“Some trust in chariots and some in horses, but we trust in the name of the Lordour God.”  (Psalm 20:7

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